The Nature of Prayer

 

Tunisian Synagogue, Acco

Every so often (not often enough), I find myself flipping through Martin Buber’s anthology called “Tales of the Hasidim.” As I read, I often discover that my appreciation or lack of appreciation for the teachings he shares has much to do with my own spiritual development and thinking. Today I had a moment to pick up this book and found a teaching that resonated with me. The topic is prayer.

From Buber, “Rabbi Moshe of Kobryn related: ‘My teacher, Rabbi Mordecai of Lekhovitz, taught me how to pray. He instructed me as follows: He who utters the word “Lord” and in doing so prepares to say “of the world,” is not speaking as he should. At the moment he is saying “Lord,” he must only think of offering himself up to the Lord, so that even if his should should leave him with the “Lordm” and he were not able to add the word “world,” it would be enough for him that he had been able to say “Lord.” This is the essence of prayer.” (Buber, Tales of the Hasidim: Late Masters).

This teaching presents, quite clearly, the idea of bringing our full attention and awareness to the present moment. For those that don’t know, “Lord of the world” (awkward sounding in English) is a very common phrase in Hebrew prayers. Here we are being asked to not simply gloss over this phrase. Instead we’re being asked to isolate each individual word and speak it fully.

Many of us, especially in the Jewish community, approach prayer with much less than the fullness of our attention, awareness, and being. If we hold up this teaching as a way of assessing the quality and integrity of our prayers, many of us will likely concede that we don’t meet the threshold presented here. The next time I find myself in a prayer space, I am going to see if I can bring my full present-tense awareness to the utterance of a single word.

Judaism on Death, the Afterlife and Reincarnation

Someone recently asked me about these interesting topics. I’m posting my reply here, because I know that lots of people have this question. My answer is just that, MY answer. Judaism leaves a lot of room for interpretation!

 

Judaism generally doesn’t speculate on what “came before” and “what comes after.” Davis kids love to ask the question, “If God created everything, who or what created God?” It’s a perfectly fine question, but in some profound way it isn’t a Jewish question because it doesn’t have an answer that will meaningfully impact the way we live our lives. A more Jewish question would be, “What are the implications of the idea that God created all living beings in terms of how I live my life today?”

 

So, a classic Jewish teaching is that we don’t speculate about what came before and what comes after. No one has come back from the land of the dead to tell us what it’s like over there, and God didn’t make the afterlife manifest to us at the revelation at Mt. Sinai or any other time when God surely could have. So, clearly we’re not meant to know and it doesn’t really matter much for how we live each day. That hasn’t stopped some Jews from speculating and/or dreaming about what it will be like, but all they’re doing is speculating and, in some ways, fetishizing the whole idea (for example, “the world to come is one giant Beit Midrash.”)

 

Reincarnation is a bit more interesting. There are some ideas that sound a bit like reincarnation in Judaism, but at its core, Judaism doesn’t believe in reincarnation as much as it believes in the immortality of the soul. The fact that we have walked this earth, lived, loved, worked, contributed… all of this counts for something and somehow continues to have some kind of presence in the world long after we’re gone. The most obvious and compelling example of this idea in my mind is children—we literally live on, genetically, through our children. But I am confident that this idea has resonances that go far beyond the literal fact of procreation.

 

What do you think?

Jewish Marriage Retreat

3 years ago, my wife, Rabbi Loren Filson Lapidus, and her colleague, Rabbi Lydia Medwin, created a marriage retreat through our synagogue, The Temple, in Atlanta, GA. Since both Loren and Lydia are married to rabbis, the 4 of us have led this retreat for the last 3 years. It’s a wonderful experience for us as leaders and for the couples that participate. Prior to leading a marriage retreat I had never really entertained the idea of attending one. Now I’m a huge advocate of the idea and think that all couples should find a chance to do something like this. Whether you’re newly married or approaching a milestone anniversary, there’s so much to be gained. Here are a few considerations/ things to expect, based on my experience:

  1. Dedicated couples time. While there’s work to be done on a marriage retreat, there’s also time to simply be together. With life being so busy, this in and of itself is a great thing.
  2. Expect to work. All relationships take work and focused energy. The more significant the relationship, the more work. Because marriage is such an important part of life, there’s a healthy amount of work needed to keep a marriage vibrant, honest, fulfilling and healthy.
  3. Meet other couples. There’s a bond of intimacy that’s quickly created on a marriage retreat. With each of the 3 groups we’ve led, I’ve seen friendships form and, more importantly, last. Sometimes married life can be lonely or isolating. A marriage retreat is a quick and effective way to address that, even if it’s not a pressing need.

There’s more that can be said, but the best thing to do is experience it yourself!

Who Knows One?

There’s a popular Passover song called, “Who Knows One?” I’ve been hearing it sung a lot lately due to the many “Model Seders” that are happening at The Davis Academy in anticipation of the upcoming holiday. In that spirit, I want to offer a quick glimpse at the meaning of the song.

The song itself is a list. It goes from 1 to 13. Each number is matched with an appropriate concept or theme from Jewish tradition which makes sense for that particular number. It begins at 1 and adds a number each time, growing in length until all 13 concepts are recited. Here they are:

1. God 2. The Tablets of the Covenant. 3. The Patriarchs (Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob). 4. The Matriarchs (Sarah, Rebecca, Leah, and Rachel). 5. The Five Books of the Torah (Pentateuch). 6. The Six Orders of the Mishnah (early collection of Jewish law and teaching, 2nd century CE). 7. Days of the week. 8. Days from the birth of a baby boy until circumcision. 9. Months from conception until birth. 10. The Ten Commandments. 11. The stars in Joseph’s Dream (see Genesis 37:9). 12. The Twelve Tribes of Israel. 13. The Thirteen Attributes of God (See Exodus 34:6-7).

On the one hand, these 13 different items may have been chosen simply because they lined up numerically. On the other hand, they may have been chosen with great care, intention, and maybe even some subtle spiritual significance. I’ll leave it to you to reflect on whether you think it’s more about the numbers or whether there are other, less visible, threads that weave these 13 different concepts together.